This weekend, we met a pastor who spent time bragging talking about how many churches he has planted. He is currently planting a new church and was inviting us to the opening service. I am not sure why he feels led to plant churches in an area where there is no shortage of churches and where only 6% of the population actually attends church regularly! There is no problem yet of churches that are full to capacity—most have more than enough room to quadruple their attendance without the need to expand or start another church. Maybe we should be encouraging people to attend the existing Bible Believing churches? But I digress--that is another matter altogether. I guess if I had not had the following conversation with him, I would have been more charitable. The pastor asked my husband and me how many children we had and I told him one and shared that we were being led by God to adopt. His unsolicited advice: adoption is a wonderful thing, but we should first have at least three biological children and then consider adopting another one! What!!!!!! My husband was inwardly cracking up waiting to see what his formerly introverted wife who is a newly minted fierce activist would say. I was quickly praying for grace and an appropriate response while at the same time wondering at the velocity of a paper plate full of food that I was holding if I "accidentally" dropped it and if I was in the path of danger! Thankfully God is full of grace and someone interrupted our conversation and took the pastor away from imminent danger! Needless to say, if I had been looking for a new church home, his new church would not be the choice for our adopted child/ren! It is obvious that he believes bio children have more worth or value than adopted children.
4 comments:
Wow. I'm still concerned by his answer to you. There is never a flat answer for a family to have so many children before they move toward adoption and for a Pastor to say that is quite disturbing. I wonder, how will he feel about International adoption? I would feel a little uncomfortable. I moved my church home because I did not like how they were so judgemental on many areas and that did not work for me. I'm clearly not saying change your church home, but please start watching for signs and will this work for your new family.
Tami,
thankfully this pastor was only inviting us to the opening service at the new church he is planting. I would have gone to be supportive, but after our conversation, I am still not feeling very charitable towards him! So far, I have not gotten very many negative comments regarding our adoptions, but I know they will come and I am praying that I can have an appropriate response that is full of grace. I really crave that God is glorified thoughtout our adoption process. I look forward to hearing about your referral!
Ohhhhh...I was up so late last night that I totally missed that part. I saw it as soon as I clicked on. Sleep is a wonderful thing! LOL Thank you for my fabric!!!!!! Awesome!!!!
That is CRAZY! I would have loved to hear his explanation.
Since I think everyone should be like me ... maybe everyone needs 10 bio. kids before they adopt. (Just kidding ...)
Blessings,
Laurel :)
mama of 13
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